Harry M. Bagdasian
Sharon's Play
a short play by Harry Michael Bagdasian
SYNOPSIS
Young marrieds, Sharon and Jerry, both in their mid-twenties, see their relationship nearly crumble because of a miscarriage. Then when going through a box of snapshots, they find a way to cope.
CHARACTERS:
SHARON MICHAELSON, age 25, an ex-farm girl with a tough exterior, yet big heart, traits acquired while growing up in this rural farmland. The repercussions (seemingly beyond her control) from a recent event, have left this clerk-typist unemployed, very unsure and frightened. She is married to:
JERRY MICHAELSON, age 25, the son of a local waterman, and who wants a career in the well-ordered world of electronics. He's currently a TV cable installer and moonlighting handy-man. Usually a very amiable young man he now finds himself a little overwhelmed in new, uncharted waters.
VERA KINGSTON (nee Edwards), an aging "bobbysoxer" who owns and manages this boarding house.
TIME: 1988
SETTING:
The set could be as simple as a small couch and coffee table representing Sharon and Jerry’s sparsely furnished apartment. A pool of light could serve the short scene on the front porch of this old Victorian manse. There is a medium sized cardboard box sitting by the entrance to the apt. Several "Book of Lists" or other such “easy reading” books are on the couch.
SCENE ONE
Wednesday Evening
SHARON, dressed in faded jeans and a tee-shirt, is looking through a bag of groceries, delivered by her landlady, VERA KINGSTON. SHARON extracts a jar of dry-roasted peanuts and munches a few during the following:
VERA
... happy to do it for you; change is in the bag there. I'm just amazed at all the different kinds of bottled water they're selling nowadays. Did I get you ...
SHARON pulls a gallon jug of inexpensive spring water from the bag as:
SHARON
This is fine, thanks.
VERA
S'amazing, don't you think? Years ago whenever anyone went to Europe they were told not to drink the water. Now they're paying a dollar a bottle for it.
SHARON
Doctor says well water and I aren't getting along too good.
VERA
I'd think you'd need the iron. Oh whatever. You're feeling better now, aren't you? Not that I mind picking things up for you at the grocery, I just think maybe some sun ...
SHARON
I appreciate you running all these errands for me ...
VERA
I always tell everyone you and Jerry are dream tenants ...
SHARON
Since I got out of the hospital ...
VERA
It's been three weeks. Maybe some sun.
SHARON
... I've been too weak to go ...
VERA
I'll let you rest, then. (pauses at door) Jerry is fixing to repair that front porch light.
SHARON
He's taken on extra work -- moonlighting nights.
VERA notices the box of clothes by the door
VERA (sympathetic)
You bought all those clothes. Should I ... [take them out?]
SHARON
He needs a new breaker.
VERA
Maybe you should keep them. I mean eventually ...
SHARON (cutting VERA off)
For the light to work on the porch he needs a new breaker.
VERA
Fine. I'd feel better if it were working properly before I leave Friday morning. When the Chairman of the Board performs in the east -- I'm in the audience. Did I tell you I was there at the Paramount in New York? He was singing with the Tommy Dorsey Band back then.
SHARON's heard it all before, but she likes VERA and the stories she tells
SHARON (almost smiles)
Girls fainting, throwing panties at the stage ...
VERA (with mock modesty)
Some were.
SHARON (kidding)
Vera ...
VERA
The man just had that kind of power over us. I feel sorry for those Elvis fans. Their King is gone. But my Frankie? -- still with us. What a voice! He doesn't sound the way he did back then, but I can't wear a size six any more either. There's no stopping time, is there?
SHARON
No.
VERA
Hon, let me take you out to the beach while the sun's still with us.
SHARON
I have my books.
VERA
With Jerry working for the cable TV I'd think ...
SHARON
I never liked that much television anyway. We got good money for it.
VERA
I've got that old black and white portable television.
SHARON
(SHARON shakes her head, "No") The doctor said just rest.
VERA
You're still young, there's plenty of time for more babies.
SHARON
I'll let you know about the beach.
VERA (exiting)
Everything looks better with a little perspective, hon. Well, have a good evening.
SHARON
Thanks, Vera.
SHARON
Evening already. Another evening. (sighs).
SHARON picks up one of her books, opens the jar of peanuts and begins reading. Abruptly, there's a lighting shift. SHARON gets up, and, fully energized, steps into a light downstage center. This is the SHARON she's lost touch with, the dynamic woman she remembers herself to be before the miscarriage. She addresses the audience:
SHARON
Damn! Who is that woman? Weak-willed. Frightened! What have I become? Let me tell you something. Ten, eleven years back, when I was in school, there were warm and maybe not so warm days when walking home from the bus, I'd cut across the pasture instead of going all the way up the road to the drive. I'd find Blackjack -- moody and spirited as he was, I'd jump up on his back, grab his mane and ride him up to the house. No reigns, no saddle, no tack, nothing. Just hop that unpredictable horse and ride. I handled him. Just me and that big animal, and I always could handle him. Damn, but that took some nerve! Did that die inside me, too?
Blackout
SCENE TWO
That Night around 10:00
LIGHTS: up
SHARON is lying on the couch, covered with an afghan. She's just put her book down. JERRY, dressed in tan work clothes stands at the end of the couch sipping a soda. He makes no move to embrace his wife. During the following he never touches her, nor does he sit close to her.
SHARON
Jerry.
JERRY
You still up?
SHARON
You're kinda late tonight.
JERRY (pleased)
Got the job finished. Re-cabled all the TV's in that old nursing home.
SHARON
Good.
JERRY
Gonna pay me tomorrow night. Ready, under the table cash. That'll sure help, huh? Get the hospital off our back for a few weeks at least.
SHARON
You eat?
JERRY
Got something on the road. You?
SHARON
A snack. Wasn't much hungry.
JERRY
But your strength -- you gotta ....
SHARON
Wasn't hungry.
JERRY (looks in bag)
Get over to Servicestar for that breaker I needed?
SHARON
Vera picked up a couple things from the I.G.A. for me.
JERRY
I wanted to fix that light tonight.
SHARON
It's late.
JERRY
Wanted to get it over with.
SHARON
I got to reading. Listen to this -- the ten most bungled burglaries ...
JERRY
All that'll turn your brain to oatmeal, Sharon. Damn. You could'a gotten me that breaker switch.
SHARON
I was tired.
JERRY
I'll pick up the damn thing myself.
SHARON
Listen to this, it's a grin. This guy see, he tries to ...
JERRY
I don't wanna hear it, okay?
SHARON
Well, I thought it was funny
JERRY
I'm not in the mood ...
SHARON
I wasn't in the mood to go out, okay?
JERRY
You call the Goodwill?
SHARON
I forgot.
JERRY (indicating box)
It's been sitting here for ...
SHARON
I'm not ready
JERRY (picks up box)
I'm taking it to the dumpster.
SHARON
No, I'll take care of them.
JERRY
When?
SHARON
Soon.
JERRY
You said that last week.
SHARON
I don't think I want his clothes in a Goodwill store somewhere, okay?
JERRY
It's gotta go.
SHARON
Jerry, put it down. (He puts it down) You just can't put it in the trash. Why are you acting like nothing happened?
JERRY
I'm not acting like nothings happened. I'm being realistic.
SHARON
No you're not.
JERRY
We didn't get a lot of choice in the matter. Life's tough, okay?
SHARON
"Life's a bitch, then you die." Thanks, Jer.
JERRY
I'm going to bed.
SHARON
Wait.
JERRY
What?
SHARON
What about never going to bed angry? Didn't we ... [agree]?
JERRY
Yeah, well, that was back then. Before. This is now.
JERRY exits. SHARON plops down on the couch, pick up her book and tries to read.
Abruptly, the lights shift. SHARON enters a pool of light downstage center and talks to the audience.
SHARON
You know what steams me? The first thing everyone asks is how old I am. 'Oh," they reassure me, 'you're young enough to have other babies.' Right. I wanted that baby -- William. Not Bill or Billy -- he was too strong. We could see that from the ultra sound thing they did. We even got to keep the pictures of him in there. Oh yeah. He was definitely a William. They just don't know how real he was to us. It's gotten almost silly now, three weeks since it happened. People call. "I'm so sorry you lost the baby." "No problem," I want to tell them. "We're still looking. It's a small apartment, so I'm sure he'll turn up someday soon." I didn't lose the baby, I had a miscarriage. Our son died. But they don't know. They're sure I'll have more because I'm young enough. Young enough for what? To go back to work? To understand why Jerry won't talk about it? Young enough for what? To have extra years to live with it -- or young enough to forget. I'll never be that young.
SHARON retreats to the couch.
Blackout
SCENE THREE
a few moments later
Holding a shoe box, JERRY enters quickly to the pool of light downstage, desperate to talk to someone. But he is alone. For a moment, we're more aware of the night. We hear crickets, maybe a boat passing on the river.
VERA (entering, crosses to JERRY)
That you, Jerry?
JERRY
Yes, ma’am..
VERA
Good evening.
JERRY
Sorry that the porch light's not fixed, Vera. Sharon forgot to pick up the breaker I needed.
VERA
She didn't forget, Jerry. The girl's petrified. She won't leave the house. She needs to let it all go and you do to.
JERRY
It's not my fault!
VERA
She knows it's not your fault. She thinks it’s hers.
JERRY
She's telling me I'm acting like nothing's happened. I was so angry! Her talkin' to me that way! My Dad would've smacked her! But that's not me.
VERA
You're better than that, Jerry.
JERRY
So I'm up there standing at our dresser, looking at myself in the mirror and for the umpteenth time in three weeks, I decide it's time to cut out of here; no figuring her out -- no hope of changing things.
VERA
That's not you, either, Jerry.
JERRY
Absolutely! So I'm not sure whether to go back and talk to her or just go to sleep all angry and all. Damn!
VERA
What's in the box?
JERRY
Was on the bed -- box of pictures -- some of them scattered on the quilt. I started tossing them into the box when I saw this one picture. The two of us. It was back when ... (he stops) ... doesn't matter when it was ...
VERA
A better time?
JERRY
Better times, yeah. And I'm thinking while I look at that picture, where's that girl gone? She's not like that now. Not anymore.
VERA
You're certain of that?
JERRY
It's just ...
VERA
How do you know? Go to her. She needs you.
JERRY
I don't know who's got the bigger need right now, Vera; her for me or me for her.
VERA
Go on. Go upstairs. And if she's asleep, wake her up.
JERRY
Goodnight, Vera.
VERA
Good luck, Jerry.
LIGHTS: fade out as
JERRY takes a couple of deep breaths and exits
Scene Four
Immediately Following
JERRY enters, goes to the couch where SHARON is reading
JERRY (quiet, tentative)
(indicating the shoe box) When you get this out?
SHARON
Was looking at 'em earlier. Did you ever realize that everyone in your family wears glasses?
JERRY
Really?
JERRY sits on the couch, places the box between them. He takes off the lid, folds back the tissue paper, and they begin to look through the pictures.
SHARON
See. Here. B.J.'s wedding. Your parent's anniversary party. Lots of specs. The lunch after Donny's kid's baptism.
JERRY
Yeah. So they do.
JERRY pulls out another picture
He shows it to her
SHARON
High School senior picnic.
JERRY
Just a few year's ago.
SHARON
More like six or seven, Jer.
JERRY
I'spose.
SHARON
You'd been playin' touch football, remember. Good lookin' boy.
JERRY (slightly defensively)
Still am.
SHARON
Little, yeah.
JERRY
Damn, I look so young.
SHARON
That long hair.
JERRY
You dyed it blond, remember?
SHARON
A great smile.
JERRY
Looks different. Makes you wonder who that person is and where he's gone, don't it?
SHARON picks up another picture
SHARON
That was a while ago.
JERRY
We were out looking for a tree. Our first Christmas tree. (picks up another picture.) Here. This is just after you axed it down, remember?
SHARON (a little amazed)
That was me.
JERRY
It's you.
SHARON
Me?
JERRY
Course.
SHARON
Different. I look different.
JERRY
You took the axe from me and chopped that sucker down.
SHARON
I did, didn't I?
JERRY
You were on the ball that day.
SHARON
Gimme another.
JERRY rummages into the box and pulls a picture from the bottom of the pile. He starts to give it to her, but stops
JERRY
Ah, not this one.
SHARON
Let me ... oh.
Without thinking, SHARON quickly takes the picture from JERRY before she realizes what it is. She becomes very still. Both of them do because it is the ultra-sound photograph of their dead son.
SHARON
William.
They sit quiet, the two of them, without looking at one another. Then, after a moment, SHARON without looking at him:
SHARON
I'm stuck, Jer. It feels like quicksand and I don't know what to do about it. I know what I'm supposed to do. What everyone's expected. I'm supposed to be some kind of "super mom" -- the super mom of the eighties. Have a job, be a wife, be a lover, be a mother. (she stops, then quietly:) I messed up.
They do not look at each other during the following:
JERRY
Don't say that.
SHARON
How do I stop it?
JERRY
You just stop.
SHARON
Thanks!
JERRY
What do you want?
SHARON
I don't know. (then quickly:) I want you.
JERRY (finally, turning to her)
Sharon, I have all these emotions. They're all bigger than me! All these feelings with not enough places to put them.
SHARON
You want to just file them away, don't you?.
JERRY
I have to. Otherwise there'd be too much goin' on, dontcha see? And, and, and, hell, I don't even think I have enough room for it all any more!
SHARON
You think I do? You think 'cause I'm a girl I have more pockets or something like that to carry all this, this stuff? Well, I don't! Who's gonna help me figure this out if you can't?
JERRY
Who's gonna help me? I'm sorry you lost the baby, Sharon!
SHARON
It's not that easy! It's not like losing car keys or something!
JERRY
I know this isn't car keys!
SHARON
At least when I do that I know they're in the apartment! Somewhere! That kept things under, you know, a kind of control. This room, that one or you know, in there. There's a limit to it. But there are no boundaries to this. This is endless! We have to do something!
Desperate to help, but unsure how, JERRY looks at her for a short moment, then gently asks:
JERRY
You need some kind of boundary here?
SHARON
Can't we do something, you and me? It has to be you and me.
JERRY doesn't have an answer. They both look down at their hands. Neither has an answer. Then JERRY gently empties the shoe box, holds it out to her.
JERRY
Maybe we just need to say goodbye.
SHARON
You think?
JERRY
Maybe it's like a finish line we have to cross or something. We can even put in some of the clothes or a toy -- from that box over there.
Hesitantly, SHARON goes to the box next to the door and removes a little receiving blanket from it as she tells him very matter-of-factly:
SHARON
When Blackjack got so old and was dying, we didn't want to put him down. But the way that old horse looked at us -- he was just layin' there. We'd been up with him most the night. It was hopeless. Daddy suggested I go back to the house and fix us some coffee, so I did.
SHARON carefully wraps the ultra-sound photo in the blanket, and returns to the couch as
SHARON
Back over to the house, I was at the sink, water was running, but I still heard the gun shot. It hurt, but, you know, it was cut and dry. Daddy took care of everything. All I had to see was a mound of fresh dirt on the hillside up from the pond.
SHARON sits on the couch. The shoe box is on JERRY's lap. She carefully places the little bundle in the box. JERRY then lovingly folds the tissue paper closed and carefully places the lid on the shoe box. JERRY keeps both hands on the lid during the following:
JERRY
I loved him, too, you know.
SHARON
You did, Jer, I know you did.
JERRY
First thing in the morning?
SHARON
Over to Dad's farm. Under that big dogwood.
JERRY
Good.
SHARON
I want to wear black.
JERRY
Can we ask Vera? She can read from her Bible.
SHARON
I'd like that very much.
JERRY places the box on the coffee table before them. They look at the box a moment, then …
For the first time, they embrace.
They hold each other very tight until the lights have faded to black.
LIGHTS BLACKOUT
END OF PLAY